About music, lament and the Mother’s Day

Music has always been an integral part of my life. According to my mum (I do not remember that) at the age of 5 or 6 I could find sounds and melodies in almost every object of daily use. My interest in singing, dancing and playing instruments was growing with me within the years. From year two of primary school I asked for “only one thing”: Please, buy me a piano. Hesitation for such a purchase on my parent’s side was understandable for many reasons: expenses, small flat in which we lived (42 m2 for 4 people) and child’s request which will disappear quickly. But I was persistent in nagging and finally a second hand piano was purchased and my adventure of learning to read the music and how to play begun. Consequently, a lot of noise (which I created while practising) in our block of flats which caused applause from some neighbours and swearing from others. In my teen years I added into my music passion self-taught guitar- playing and then years later, when already in religious life, the dream of playing the church organs. I am not a musician but I love music. Music connects different memories of my life journey and describes my life experiences. This is why I can equally enjoy some good classical music, pop, rock, jazz or contemporary Christian pieces. Music is for me a channel of expressing different emotions: from sadness to joys, from tragedies to successes, from telling the stories to having fun and to pray. Music is for me a tool to gather people together to celebrate. It is a tool for connection. One of the way of connection is also connection with God.

I love the book of Psalms in the Bible. Some of them are really well known (Psalm 23), other are not so popular or hardly ever heard of. It is not even historically proven that the Biblical psalms were ever sung (despite common understanding that King David was playing musical instruments or singing). As a nun I enjoyed praying Liturgy of Hours, which consist of many psalms from the Bible. Most of the time we recite them together in the community and on some special occasions we sing or chant them. One of the things which I discovered when praying psalms over the years, that so many of them express people’s distress, complaints, doubt, anger and cry for help. These kind of psalms, also known as lament are actually about 67 out of all 150 psalms in the Bible. If you read just Ps 3, 57 or 139 you will hear individuals expressing their emotions through lament. There are also group laments in the Bible (e.g. Ps 44 or 80). You can even find an entire book dedicated to lament called: Book of Lamentations.

I thought about those lamenting songs the other day when watching the news and listening to the statistics about the people who died because of the global pandemic. And this weekend, as we celebrate Mother’s Day, I imagined mothers who lost their children and children who lost their mothers. I think about all those who recently lost their mums and miss them dearly. I pray for those who are worried about their mums wellbeing. I pray for mother’s who lament loss of their babies and for those women who desire to become mothers.

The lamenting songs in the Bible are the ones which make us the closest to one another and to God. He hears the cry of the poor (Ps 34). It is ok to express the pain and protest over challenges especially when the darkness seems to be overwhelming. Those prayers are well known to God as he himself was in the dark places leading him to a lament from the cross: My God, my God, why have you forsaken me? (Ps 22).

This week I pray that you find your way of expressing what is in your heart through singing, playing musical instrument, art, cooking…. whatever is best for you. Allow yourself to name your lament and finding closeness with God who understand your feelings, even if you cannot see too much brightness ahead of you. He loves you and cares for you and people you love. You are as close to him as an apple of his eye (Ps 17).

Have a good week everyone.

Sr Grace

P.S. Make yourself a cuppa and enjoy the song from the Sons of Korah singing Psalm 17.